Dear Diamond Girls,
If you’ve found this blog post, it’s likely because you’re in a situation with a man you care deeply for, with great potential for a long-lasting love, yet ultimately he is not claiming you in the significant way you desire.
Walking away can and will fix whatever is going wrong – but it must be done the right way, for the right reasons.
Before you skip ahead, it is IMPORTANT you understand the following:
Walking away absolutely works.
It’s perfectly okay if you feel scared by the thought of walking away.
This isn’t about rushing a man into commitment or forcing him to change.
You don’t have to pack up and leave immediately.
Walking away can be done mentally and physically.
My technique for Walking Away is in alignment with your authentic Feminine Energy. When your relationship’s energy is balanced, the man naturally pursues you. Watch this video if you are new to Feminine Energy methods.
You may also enjoy Podcast Episode #17: How to Walk Away From a Man, Without Really Leaving.
1. This isn’t about rushing a man into commitment or forcing him to change.
Men can get comfortable having you come to their house, helping to decorate, traveling with them and having all the benefits of marriage with none of the responsibility. This is also known as The Girlfriend Trap.
As a woman, you have the right to know where your relationship is going. If you’ve been dating for at least three months and things are going well, you have the right to ask: “I’m curious where do you see us going?”
You may be unsure if you are ‘just dating’ or committed. You have the right to ask: “I’m curious, are we just dating or committed?”
When you ask this question, it is vital the man replies out loud to you, as he needs to hear himself say the words.
You are not here to change the man, you are speaking these words to establish your boundaries and get clarity.
A man’s words can mean nothing, however, so it is important he takes action within a reasonable time. If he does not, you must walk away, or revisit the Terms and Conditions. (I discuss this deeply in my “500 Ways” ebook & Femm Tools For Dating program.)
2. You don’t have to pack up and leave immediately. Walking away can be mental as well as physical.
Feminine Energy is about leaning back, it is not about being used as a doormat. You walking away begins with peeling your energy off the man. This means making your life rich, full and juicy. It also means practicing less problem solving and more silence.
Offering space, not searching for solutions and just listening offer necessary ‘cave time’ for a man to solve whatever is going on. He needs this time and space to ‘figure things out’ and to miss you.
3. Walking away feels scary – Here’s how to do it.
You may believe walking away means the relationship is over. Yet something as simple as turning and facing your window in the car ride home is a type of ‘walking away.’ When’s the last time you quietly looked away from your partner? How would it feel to offer the relationship this small slice of space?
When you lean back in your Feminine Energy, the man has space to pursue you and lean forward. A man gets activated in his Masculine Energy when the woman stops doing his work and allows him space to respond and fix whatever is going on.
In conversations, you can also pause and count to six after your man speaks, giving him ample time to feel space. Notice if he speaks to fill the space or has more to say.
If your partner ever gets loud or angry, and you have a strict boundary of “no raised voices,” you can let him know, “Voices are getting raised. Please let’s keep it down or I’ll need to leave the room until things calm.”
I often hear from my clients that the moment a woman turns away, the man calms down. One client reported she exited a conversation and retreated to the bathroom, only to have her man stand and apologize outside the door. Notice if your man pursues you once you turn away. If he wants to fix things, even if you are upset, allow him space to be a man and repair whatever is wrong.
You also don’t need to answer his questions immediately, nor know exactly how you feel. Masculine Energy can be urgent, and if you are feeling rushed, practice slowing down. You can say, “I’m not sure how I feel. I need to feel my way through,” or, “This is just how I feel.”
You need not explain or defend how you feel. A man may not like your boundaries or requesting clarity, but own how you feel and do not waver. Confidence and a willingness to walk away compels most men to pursue a woman.
Get more tips like these in, “500 Ways to Talk to a Man.”
Walking Away is not about flaunting your ability to leave a man, that you have other options, or threatening to leave. Walking away also doesn’t mean leaving the relationship and breaking things off with your man. You can for a time peel your energy off him, focus on the positive in the relationship, then revisit the matter of commitment of whatever it may be.
However, in some cases, you may need to step away from the relationship by moving out, keeping your options open/Quantum Dating, or walking away because you two are “not on the same page.” Femm Tools for Dating is essential for you, as well as my ABCs program.
If you are in a Girlfriend trap, where you’ve been dating for some time yet there’s no solid discussion of a proposal or setting a date for marriage, you will have to walk away. I’ve noticed the older a man is, or if he has anxiety issues, that the woman nearly ALWAYS must walk away.
When you walk away from a man, he may begin to pursue you once again.
Rebuilding takes skill! There are no instant relationships and rebuilding takes time. The Feminine Energy tools I teach you in the ABCs program ensure you do not get caught in the girlfriend trap again.
This isn’t about playing games… This is about expressing your authentic self as a high quality woman, who, if she MUST, will boldly move on and explore her options.
Confidence is extremely attractive. I suggest you get familiar with the energetic mindset that you will not only land on your feet and have options, but that you desire a loving relationship with kindness, acceptance, honesty, affection, empathy and growth.
If you feel you’re lacking confidence, that no man will love you, or simply want to boost your Feminine Energy vibe, you need my “100 Men” tool. This is in my VIP Library, which offers 20+ items *free* with any program purchase such as ABCs or Femm Tools.
I hope this blog post has been helpful for you in deciding when to walk away, and what to say or practice prior.
Sending you much love,