Heal Your Relationship with Two Powerful Feminine Energy Tools
Dear Diamond Girls,
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Respect & Accepting a Man’s “No”
A listener wrote in and asked me, “How is it right when a man changes his mind about important plans, tells me no, and I’m supposed to just accept this?”
I really appreciated this question because so often women who are struggling in their masculine energy want to know, in essence, “why is it appropriate to let a man off the hook?” or “why do we need to appease to men?”
Let me clear this matter up.
Accepting a person’s “no” doesn’t mean you approve of their behavior. It means you are not going to struggle and lose yourself in their issues.
Respecting a man who bails on plans, (I assume with no good reason) is neither right nor wrong. Is it a let-down? Yes! But it’s not good or bad. Masculine energy can be very black or white when it comes to thinking.
See if you can notice when you judge things as right or wrong.
Feminine Energy Gets Clarity, and Sets Boundaries
In the above situation, if a man bails on plans with you, you can either:
- Resist it – fight against his no. (I think we all know how that will end.)
- Accept it – this is his decision, and you have no control over this person.
When you accept the man’s “no” you let go of the struggle. You can absolutely let a man know, “I hear you, and I don’t agree with this.” You can turn your back and walk away, leaving him alone with his decision.
Is this always easy to do?
Of course not. Practicing feminine energy such as boundaries and walking away means being mindful of the judgements and expectations you have on people, places and things.
When our inner boy loses his illusion of control, we can feel wounded. Feminine energy allows you to step back and check in with how you feel regarding the situation, and take care of yourself foremost!
Practicing these tools means positive change.
You may see your partner differently. You might realize you put pressure on them to go along with your plan. Likewise, you might have empathy that your man isn’t the best with assertive communication skills.
These are very different issues than is something simply, “right or wrong.”
Whatever is going on inside the man is for him to figure out. You’re accepting his “no” in what he can or cannot do.
You can also establish your boundaries and use “I feel” statements.
You can say: I feel sad you won’t be going, and I accept your ‘no.’ I was looking forward to spending time together, and next time, please give me notice if you wish to cancel.
If you give him a third chance after this, that’s always up to you!
Listen to my latest podcast episode: What a man wants more than love.
You can listen on several podcast platforms, or watch the replay on my YouTube Channel.
Learn how to speak in a way that men truly hear.
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Sending you much love today & always,