I felt shocked, disturbed, scared and sad.
That’s what I remember feeling the first time I received an unwanted dick pic from a man that I otherwise enjoyed chatting with and getting to know.
When it comes to sexual texts, a dick pic is really the tip of the iceberg if you think about it. Yet clever men can allude to sex and watch for our reactions in a number of ways.
Interesting fact: in some states it is ILLEGAL & a punishable crime to send an unwanted nude photo.
Keep in mind, even ‘good guys’ test women! Men are testing a woman’s VALUE always. Never forget that.
Just as in a limbo dance, he thinks, ‘how low will she go?’ Albeit a man may NEVER admit to this!
TRUE STORY: One night (back in my single days) I had a nice phone call with a man. I felt like we had a good connected in our first ever 30 minute phone call.
SIDE NOTE ON DATING: For those of you unfamiliar with FEMM Dating Tools, I suggest after a couple rounds of texting to request a phone call from the man. This helps you Avoid Time Wasters!
1. When and if the man actually takes time to pick up the phone and call you, this shows he can invest in you beyond merely texting. 2. You also get the knowledge that he can (or cannot) make full sentences in which the latter may be a deal breaker. 😁
That night after the phone call with the ‘nice man’ less than 30 seconds later he texts me, “Your voice sounded really sexy. I have to admit, I'm turned on.”
I got an instant creep vibe from him.
I went from feeling a genuine connection to turned off and weirded out.
I was new to Feminine Energy and didn’t quite understand how to process my own triggers or feelings.
I engaged and wrote the man back saying I appreciated the thought yet telling me this felt too sudden.
He wrote back very quickly, telling me he was sorry and he sometimes, “just has no impulse control.”
He then asked, “What felt sudden about what I said?”
Here’s the thing, you're not for anyone’s entertainment and any man you have yet to meet or are new to getting to know is NOT your therapist or priest. You owe him nothing!
In other words, don’t spell out SEX or any other uncomfortable topic for a man.
You simply state how you feel and well, that’s how you feel.
“It felt sudden and that’s just how I feel.”
Remember neither of you owe anyone a thing!
Lean away from giving EXCUSES & EXPLAINING with men.
Your explanation might just fuel a perverse fire. Yuck!
I blocked the guy and looking back I’m unsure if I really learned anything in the moment.
I felt sick to my stomach and scared of trying to date anyone.
Back then dating meant I put my heart right out there, I felt exposed and easily wounded.
I've since learned SO much about emotional boundaries! (Be sure to check out FEMM TOOLS!)
If I could go back… I would have simply ignored his follow-up text.
In the coming days I would’ve observed if the man played nice or continued to seduce me into anything about sex.
Ignoring is a powerful tool because you get to see if the behavior continues or changes positively. You don’t engage so it can’t perpetuate.
Running from the trigger is not the answer unless protecting yourself is imminent.
You move up tiers to become your most powerful feminine energy woman when you learn how to embrace what you feel in your body and speak it, ignore what doesn't call for a responce and as much as you can simply observe & practice with men.
I believe you make important energy shifts when you face a trigger without blaming or wronging anyone and simply allow it to unfold.
The beauty of moving up tiers and attracting the man you are meant to be with is in the EVENTUAL unfolding of who you are as a Powerful Dynamite #DiamondGirl.
You are finding your way with every man
that crosses your path.
When you ‘next’ or delete someone, nothing has the opportunity to unfold.
QUICK TIP: When shaken by an unwanted photo or words, connect to a loving wise strength coming from the center of the earth through your feet and into your legs. Feel the power of generations of women who have walked this ground before you. Thank them and thank your feet and legs for helping you stand firm in your boundaries.
By facing a sexual trigger YOU move up many tiers, and who knows you may even change the man in a positive way and for the next girl on his path.
Remember, you can ignore anyone and delete them instantly, yet I encourage you experiment with letting words “just be words” and stating how you feel without blame.
Here are some examples of things we might be tempted to say when a man abruptly talks about sex, followed by ways that you can alternately respond.
“How dare you, I haven’t even met you!”
This can be transformed into, “I feel really shocked by this. I’m feeling we’re not on the same page?”
If a man ever asks, 'why?' As in 'why do you feel that way,' you can ALWAYS reply, 'Hmm, it’s just how I feel.' – 500 Ways to Talk to a Man
You may be inclined to say: I feel like you keep trying to get me to talk about sex. Everything you’re saying is an innuendo leaning toward something sexual. (Or worse, you divert the conversation and talk about the weather.)
Try instead going with the flow and being playful yet not sexually playful. Example: If a man asks you what you are wearing in bed, you can reply with, “I feel flattered you’d like to know and maybe one day you will...But not tonight. Sweet dreams!”
I recently read an online comment where a woman said all night she was teasing a man and showing him her cleavage and lifting up a little bit of her dress...
While this is all well and fun to do when you’re in a committed relationship with someone, when you’re just dating and then denying a man those signals when he tries to advance towards sex, please note that this doesn’t usually end well and teasing is not what Feminine Energy is about.
Your POWER as a feminine energy woman is to be playful, remain in your body, find your feelings, choose your words, know your boundaries and do not walk down “sex street” verbally or physically unless you decide willingly do so.
#DiamondGirl, with men you are FOREVER PRACTICING. I too practice every day.
Why do you want to practice?
The answer is: You will learn how to handle any trigger with femininity and grace, CONFIDENTLY!
You move up the tiers and learn the outcome of unfolding that would otherwise not be revealed or known.
The most important reason to practice imho, is that one day you will be married to a man who will trigger you in a very similar way! And you won’t be able to 'next' or simply delete his profile!
Learn FEMM tools now and create your own happily-ever-after.
Please ASK ANY QUESTIONS in the video comments section and I'll be sure to answer you!
If you’re interested in learning more about Feminine Energy Dating check out FEMM TOOLS, and if you don’t have my e-book, 500 Ways to Talk to a Man, now is a great time to learn more about scripting and finding your feminine energy body.
Much love to you!